jesus helps me keep my pants on.
jesus helps me play guitar, but has trouble with the full C Major chord.
jesus makes sure my skinny jeans are appropriately skinny, but not so skinny that the young ladies know the dimensions of my Mr. Lonely.
jesus, I can't wait until I'm married so Mr. Lonely can meet Mrs. Lonely. or Mrs. Not-So-Lonely. or Mrs. Holy-Fuck-It's-Crowded-In-Here-I-Thought-You-Were-Saving-Yourself-Too?
jesus, is it ok if I touch myself after concerts? a lot?