sober 7 days... (1 Viewer)

[place holder]

it has been good in ways, i think more clearer, words come to me simpler.. just overall faster on my reaction, but i miss the alcohol.

i'm 26 years old, and have been drinking since 16.. didn't really drink hardcore until the last three years ago.. would get drunk for 10-12 days.

i'm sober now, but i'm actually more depressed than ever, i miss the alcohol, it's like i broke up with my girlfriend or something. i know i'm an alcoholic, but i don't really want to quit. the seven days sober was more to see if i could do it, and i did.

now i'm on the fence about opening this bottle or remaining sober a little longer. maybe i should work out a moderation plan.

any advice? i'm sure a few of you elders have been down this road.

thanks.

 

[adrian]

Mate, get some help with this while you still can, is the only advice I can give

 

[justine]

dude, you're 'more depressed than ever' because there's no alcohol in your system to numb your emotions. the increased alertness that comes with sobriety also means an increased awareness of your feelings and emotional reactions.

adrian is right - get some help with this; you can't be expected to figure this out on your own. you say you don't really want to quit (i totally understand this - i feel the same about smoking), but maybe you need to think about why you're drinking, and how it might be fucking up your daily life; i mean, are you able to hold down a job so you can pay your bills and feed yourself? are your friendships or relationships fucked or non-existent because people can't deal with your drinking? what are you like to be around when you're drunk?

i'm not saying YES YOU MUST STOP YOU BAD MAN, because there seems to be a lot of people out there who are 'functioning alcoholics' - they live their lives and get by, and really there's no other way of life for them. but please find someone professional to talk to, at least.

best of luck to you, place holder.

 

[place holder]

thanks guys, i take these words as caring.
i'm alert to my awareness, it's a depressing attribute, i've just missed going to bars, jukeboxes, now i just look for ways to kill my time while sober. (ie: reading books, music..etc)

i hold my job down, all my bills are paid...
i still deal with my emotions, i don't just neglect them until everything bottles up and explodes. my family and i are still on good terms. i was just at a point after my uncle's death where i consumed and consumed and consumed.. i didn't think about my health, now i kind of am. my livers and kidneys.

i'm not drunk 24/7... i stay sober when i have to be.
i also drink when i don't have to be, not all the time.

i was raised on tom waits, bukowski, hunter s.t., elliott smith, bob dylan..etc
i've drank with them all and my record player.

it's like meditation to drink, i find peace.

i don't condone it, it's just what it is to me, a problem, a vice, a whatever...
i am an alcoholic, i don't deny.

i'm just trying to keep balance in my life too.

i just notice i drink to more down days than happy days.

 

[1fsh2fsh]

hey place holder, rubyred is right, there are some questions that you need to ask yourself, I think that the first is why do you drink?, I'm a 53 year old man who has been drinking consistantlyly since I was about fifteen, and I like to think of this as self medication. I am what ruby calls a funtioning alchoholic. I guess I am what would be called called a troubled person and went through all the therapys and drugs that the doctors and shrinks could give me since young. nothing offered gives me the peace of alchohol and marijauna. many will call this an escape and I guess that it is, but still I "funtion" better on this than on the Pharmaceuticals. I am lucky enough to be able to be "disiplined" with my drink and really don't like to drink in the daytime, but drink mostly everynight. to stop this "cold turkey" and drink nothing would surley put me over the edge. worse than "losing a girlfriend" . other women may come along, but to try to totaly give up alchohol, forever, would not be a reasonable option. luckly enough, I have a profession and lifestyle that allows the flexibility.I guess what I am trying to say is that there are different ways for different people, and a good self examination is probably the place to start. but I think that to "sober up" for seven days after ten years of drinking and not to feel some sort of depression would be unreasonable. and again rubys right on, if drinking is complicating other parts of your life then it is probably time to make a change. moderation is the best in my opinion, but if this is not possible then I would also suggest some kind of professional advice. good luck with your situation. rick

 

[roni]

it has been good in ways, i think more clearer, words come to me simpler.. just overall faster on my reaction, but i miss the alcohol. [...] i'm sober now, but i'm actually more depressed than ever, i miss the alcohol, it's like i broke up with my girlfriend

so 1st:
You see, it's good for you to stay away from time to time. Great start!
- I do see your depression though!

you're 'more depressed than ever' because there's no alcohol in your system to numb your emotions.

I don't go along with that, ruby, dear. I feel, alcohol can make you even MORE sensitive and emotional. It takes a lot of 'will-to-emotional-blindness' to stay away from any drugs.

As I use to say:
Give us a world, that's bearable when sober, so we'll stay away from drugs!

Sure, my ruby was TOTALLY right on her concerns about being "able to hold down a job so you can pay your bills and feed yourself?"-etc...
From your answer I see, you still are.
BUT - be Aware Always!!!
I've been functioning in this sense at your age too. Well, I ain't anymore (37 now). So regularly have a lurk, o.k.?

I'd say:
Try to stay totally sober for 3 weeks at least 2 times a year (3 times wouldbe better!) - just to KEEP control.
(at least: the reason you drink is to SURVIVE, right? - so do it the RIGHT way!
Do USE the drug - don't get used by it!)

but please find someone professional to talk to, at least.

I'm not quite sure about that "someone professional" issue.
Maybe she's right. I dunno. I, personally, wouldn't go there.

now i just look for ways to kill my time while sober. (ie: reading books, music..etc)

that's funny. In my case this seems to be the first reaction too.
But once you get over the habit for some days, you're amazed how easy it is to Not-be-bored. For a start: simply stay at home (lots of pure water at your side) and watch some good movies. (I would NOT reccommend 'Barfly' at this situation. hehe)
Then go to bed early, read something. Since your mind works better when sober, try something new. How about the theory of relativity? or medieval archeology? Plato, Sextus Empiricus or David Hume maybe?
Or have a walk - that's no joke! Chose a warm night to go to the edges of your town, look over the lights, hum some sentimental song from your youth, look at the stars, feel a new/old way of freedom...

Try!

it's like meditation to drink, i find peace.

I SEE the point!

i'm just trying to keep balance in my life too.

I guess, THAT is the most valid point!
(so maybe read Plato first, hehe)

there are different ways for different people, and a good self examination is probably the place to start.

YO! kudos to 1fish!

sure, not all of us are lucky as him to 'function' - and esp. at HIS age (53!) it's amazing. I'm 37 now and have to face a Lot of problems when drinking - like the need to sleep 12+ hours (which would Stop Any employee from being able to 'function' of course! - only I'm a freelancer).

So, all in all:
- The good thing is: you're AWARE of the problem.
- The other good thing is: you seem to have found 'your' drug. I don't believe, one can survive without ANY one. (be it pot, alc, sports, TV, work, sex, cocaine, music or whatever.)
- and then: have your regular 'sobers' for at least 10 days just to make sure you still keep a human shape!


o.k.,
these were much more than 2 cents or 15 min of fame.
and - yes - how can I advice since I myself am not sober yet...
but so what...

 

[1fsh2fsh]

ure, not all of us are lucky as him to 'function' - and esp. at HIS age (53!) it's amazing.'
O c'mon Roni, 53 ain't that old. and remember kiddies, pratice makes perfect :cool:

 

[roni]

O c'mon Roni, 53 ain't that old.

you're right! I didn't mean it like that! (my last girlfriend was 48!)
I only wanted to state, that in terms of physical health, there's a huge difference between 26, 37 and 53. Isn't it?

(and btw. I worship you, babe.)

 

[1fsh2fsh]

yeah man, your right, and I knew you meant no offence, I'm very fortunate with my health with the way that I've abused myself over the years. and who knows how long that it will last. I've had a good many friend that have succumb early to this life style. and I wouldn't recomend it to anyone. to some of us it just seems better that the alternative.......

 

[Black Swan]

Hello, Place Holder!
I had to quit many things myself over the years . I had lost myself and lost many good friends too. I find that you usually end up replacing an addiction with another one. The new one needs be healthier for one thing . It may feel dull for a while but hang in there it gets easier. True that you need to find out what makes you drink. Certain situations may cause you a lot of stress, being around a lot of people and noise will do it. To stay by yourself helps and to talk about it helps. Take care of yourself first, your good friends will come around. If you are going to drink , drink a lot of water between drinks.
When my stress level would get too high I would start running. If I needed to pop something I would pop vitamin C. I chewed damn licorice sticks ( I mean the roots) for a few years. I know this sounds stupid but calcium magnesium helps. (if you have to put something in your mouth make it good)
Read, go to the gym , watch movies , study something that you like, learn to play an instrument, it works !

 

[ekim]

i'm no elder but i would like to wish you luck

 

[UrbanDKaye]

place holder -

I remember being 26 and drunk and still with a job, a wife, never been to jail... yet still thinking that the booze was getting ahead of me. There were alot of close calls, emergency rooms, blackouts, things I'd done that my friends would tell me about later. And I'd take a few days off the bottle (usually 5-9 days). "For my health," I told anyone who was interested enough to ask. Then I'd get jittery and lonely and I'd head back to the bar or the package store. And I lost the job, gave up the wife, and drank even more because there really wasn't much else, I figured.

Took me until I was 33 to really get my fill. Even an ulcer didn't slow me down much. But when things got bad enough, and my fianceé was in the middle of a grand mal seizure, and the ambulance was pulling up outside, I figured it was time to quit.

That was nearly 12 years ago. We're both sober these days, and have a baby girl. So if you decide you've had enough, there are ways to go, to carve out a good life, even a creative one, without the booze.

I agree with all who've suggested that you not try and go it alone. There are lots of people who can help. Ex-drunks, shrinks, support groups. I've leaned on all of them. First thing is deciding to save your own ass...and that's the hard part, harder than it sounds...and the only part you've got to do alone.

 

[place holder]

thanks everyone, i really do appreciate the kind words. i did have a relapse and been drinking again, but i'm trying to maintain a moderate handle on it all. we'll see how it goes. i do believe i have picked alcohol as my drug of choice. i know we're all bearing vices, some sex the pain away, some shop, some eat too much..etc.

i'm finding vitamins vital also, being that i drink. i constantly carry them with me everywhere i go. anyone have any sober solutions for the day after drinking? when you have the shakes and to get your mind functioning somewhat-good again? i know water helps a lot. i also drink a lot of green tea but i'm also a coffee addict.

oh well, it's still a endless journey of finding myself.

thanks everyone!

 

[darren]

place holder and this whole thread have inspired me.. i'm 31 years old and i get the feeling i'm alcoholic , but in denial. i have been drinking consistantly since i was about 17. and i can't remember the last day i didn't go without at least one beer, ; i don't think there has been one for years.. the first thing i would think of when i get home each day was a beer. and its not uncommon for me ,(on a weekend ) to crack a beer, and look at the clock showing 10 am. i couldn't do it without incentive so i put a bet on with a mate i could go longer than him without a drink.. the first night was tough. the second night i woke up in a pool of sweat (and its winter down here).. this is my 4th day. without.. and i was even at the pub last night. its hard but i feel its the best thing for me. i can't wait to have a beer. and its my mates 30th on the weekend so i plan on drinking then.. but any way thanks to place holder and this thread for the inspiration..

 

[Ninjerk]

Be careful going cold turkey, ladies and gentlemen. If you drink long enough and hard enough your body can form a physiological dependence on alcohol--the lack of which can kill you. If you think you want to quit look into AA or seek professional help.

 

[place holder]

yeah, heard that also.. good advice.

 

[jordan]

i'm finding vitamins vital also, being that i drink. i constantly carry them with me everywhere i go. anyone have any sober solutions for the day after drinking? when you have the shakes and to get your mind functioning somewhat-good again? i know water helps a lot. i also drink a lot of green tea but i'm also a coffee addict.

i don't drink much, so my day-after-drinking remedies focus on hangovers mostly, but you seem to be talking about general dehydration and such. i've found that electrolyte replacements work pretty well (go to any sporting goods store and you can find electrolyte tablets that don't taste that bad). the ulitmate, however, is a product called "Ceralyte Oral Rehydration Salts." the taste is difficult (imagine old rice with lemon juice), but damn does that stuff work to get me back on track.

good luck getting back into moderation... i hope it's still going okay for you.

 

[adrian]

I'd also recommend taking up a sport to help things along. Feeling better physically often goes a long way to improving your mental state. Nothing ridiculous or too strenuous. Start off with something such as swimming

 

[Black Swan]

yeah, heard that also.. good advice.

Whatever you do Place Holder or
however you do it, stay for the ride.
Trust me it is worth it.

 

[place holder]

the ride never stops... i think we're all stuck in it for awhile. :)

 

[Father Luke]

18 Fucking years sober.
19 years November 7th, 2007.

It can be dun.

 

[SouthernGentleman]

any advice? i'm sure a few of you elders have been down this road.

thanks.

This is just something I've recently discovered, because I think I may have lost a close friend due to leaving drunk phone messages (for fun), sending drunk e-mails, and so forth too often, and she thinks I'm out of control.

The thing I learned is that your friends need to have a good understanding of your drinking habits, so that they can assess whether you are still in control or out of control. What is 'out of control' drinking to someone who only drinks every so often may be perfectly manageable for you. Make sure they have a good understanding of your 'baseline', so that they can see that this high (relative to them) baseline is compatible with keeping your life together. Otherwise, they will freak out because they are using their very different standards to assess you, and that means they will peg you as an out of control alcoholic.

-Southern Gentleman

 

[IchLiebeW33D]

placeholder,
i am only 21, obviously not an elder, but still willing to offer something on the day-afters...
there is a little product containing high percentages of water soluble vitamins called "emergen-c" though I am sure there are more brands. it's amazing how much vitamin c your body can use on a given day.

eat a breakfast with your daily iron and some good protein.

drink some of these vitamins before you pass out the night before and try chugging two bottles/glasses of water. you are gonna have to go to the bathroom either way.

maybe try some wine instead of beer/spirits. hell, they say it even helped buk.

also, having a good woman or man around might help you slow down a little bit as you're drinking through the night, and you may find natural moderation there.
OR of course maybe NOT having that woman or man around can help.

lastly, marijuana.

 

[bongobill]

^^^^
lastly
but not leastly
marijuana

 

[Black Swan]

18 Fucking years sober.
19 years November 7th, 2007.

It can be dun.

Well that is courage.
I quite drinking alcohol for 5 years thinking that I could never have a drink for the rest of my life, afraid to slide incontrolably.
It did not happen that way, I like a couple of drinks at the most but I do not like to lose it. It seems that instinctively when I reach a certain level I switch to water. It just happened this way.

 

[Father Luke]

Then two years ago, I quit smoking.
I was up to four packs.

Then I gave up coffee.
I had it running through my veins.

Then I gave up meat, and I'm a vegetarian now.

I still fuck.

 

[the only good poet]

i'm finding vitamins vital also, being that i drink. i constantly carry them with me everywhere i go. anyone have any sober solutions for the day after drinking? when you have the shakes and to get your mind functioning somewhat-good again? i know water helps a lot. i also drink a lot of green tea but i'm also a coffee addict.

i found that a vigorous cycle ride somewhat eased the effects of a heavy night.

 

[ROC]

Then two years ago, I quit smoking.
I was up to four packs.

Then I gave up coffee.
I had it running through my veins.

Then I gave up meat, and I'm a vegetarian now.

I still fuck.

Four packs a what? A day? A week?
Then coffee?
Then Meat?
And booze?!?!

Jesus! you are well on the way to becoming an enlightened being! To have lived with all those little demons and then to politely escort them out the door...that's really something.
I'm surprised you can still fuck, as it may have just dropped off one day to be with a healthier body ;)
If I could just jettison one of those vices, I'd be proud of myself.
As it is, I enjoy meat but hate the process through which it arrives on my plate.
Love coffee and seem to need one after my bike rides.
Smoke the occasional cigar (like one every 3 months).

But booze, there's the real problem...
If I continue like this, I'll surely have liver problems by the time I'm 45.

So thanks to you all for the advice and inspiration.

 

[Father Luke]

Then two years ago, I quit smoking.
I was up to four packs.

Then I gave up coffee.
I had it running through my veins.

Then I gave up meat, and I'm a vegetarian now.

I still fuck.

Four packs a what? A day? A week?

Bill Hicks used to say he went through four lighters a day. I love that joke.

I smoked four packs a day, and I was headed up to five. But it was okay,
because they were non-filters.

Then coffee?
. . . I enjoy meat but hate the process through which it arrives on my plate.

I was driving Truck across America. I was at a truck stop one day, and
filling up my tanks. A cattle truck was next to me. As I stood holding the
nozzle, listening to the diesel fill the tanks, I stared at the cattle truck
without thinking.

Hey, man, a cow said to me.
Huh?
Hey - M A N ?
Can you get us out of here?

Of course it's a crazy day dream.

The cattle truck smelled of shit, and death.

I thought about that. I'd seen cows playing, and sleeping all across America,
and now I was watching them being carted off to slaughter.

I gave up meat on the spot.

Then one night I was driving alone on a long stretch of unlit road. A truck
pulled up next to me with thousands of chickens in cages.

Hey man, the chickens were saying. Can you get us out of here?

Then another truck pulled up alongside of me. There were thousands more
chickens.

Any delusions I'd been harboring that eating chicken was vegetarian was
pretty much shot to hell. I've been animal free since then.

On the down side, Hitler was a vegetarian. So what the fuck, you know?

 

[jordan]

yeah, but was hitler vegan?

 

[Father Luke]

yeah, but was hitler vegan?

Doesn't this all come full circle nicely. Remember when Bukowski was yelling
Nazi Bullshit to shock people. Maybe he was sober 7 days when he did this.

Sobriety can lead to some really insane behavior.

 

[place holder]

ah, it's been a roller coaster ride. i haven't had a drink for a whole day now. planning on just laying in bed today and reading a book, i haven't felt the best around people, i hardly do anyways. it's that hopeless feeling that climbs inside your skin and makes you want to not care, numb me up. i've also been letting women make me a little insane, they do that well, especially when you think you have attraction with one, but she doesn't turn out to be what you imagined her to be like.

i need a drink, but i'm cut myself off today. not forever, just today.
thus spoke zarathustra, i'm just read that today, not sure if it well help induce my health.
yesterday was beginning to feel like today.
thinking of the loneliness and all that you lack. ah, the bottle.
i have some ego when drunk.

 

[Black Swan]

Doesn't this all come full circle nicely. Remember when Bukowski was yelling
Nazi Bullshit to shock people. Maybe he was sober 7 days when he did this.

Sobriety can lead to some really insane behavior.

Boy!!!!!!!!!!! Your new regimen is truly working wonders.

 

[place holder]

like herion.

but i just ment the dog pic.