The First Interview

In 1994 I fell off of a mixer truck. After painful surgeries and lots of delicious, and now demonized (I HOPE you folks are not part
of any 3 lettered cult that gets erect when minding my business) narcotics...well I had a lot of time on my hands, folks. May I call you Folks?
Even better may I call YOUR Folks...for money?
Ah, forget it.
Ok, so for the first time in my life at age 34 It was revealed that I'd been living a complete lie. I had been a truck driver for years and it dawned on me that
I hate trucks.
I'd spend time on job sites telling pussy jokes with people I'd like to set ablaze.
And I did not know who I was...that was lost back in a childhood of profound abuse but hey there wasn't as much to do back in the '60's,
so often parents would terrorize tykes trussed up in a tub of tepid...a tepid tub.
How many times have I had a gun pointed at my head, you ask?
Two. Twice times---yep. That was in a commune in Berkeley in '76. That song is full of SHIT; "When you get to San Francisco...SWIVEL...Like...A LOT!! The Dream was Over and those Kerouac leftovers were PISSED!!
It gets pretty interesting moving on from this point but I feel I've...I may have gone on too long for an initial meet 'n' greet, ya know?
It was nice showing my ass to you. Hope to join in because, patently, I'm a people person.
 

Hannah

The artist formerly known as mjp
Moderator
Founding member
You know what's great though? These things.

You might not think so at first glance. I mean, if the steak was any good, you wouldn't have to "chicken fry" it, right? Well, they're really good, so I'd say since you're locked in the house anyway, get some and give them a try. While you're there, splurge on some triple-trimmed filets. You've never had anything like them. 4 minutes for the first side in a medium-hot cast-iron pan, then flip it and let it sizzle for 3 minutes, then into a 425-degree oven for 7 minutes. You're welcome.

You might also think, "What kind of savage would buy frozen meat when tons of fresh meat is conveniently laid out in barely-over-room-temperature displays right down the street at my Piggly Wiggly?" and to that I'd say, yes, I used to labor under the same misconceptions. Then frozen steaks were foisted onto me, and lo, I was well pleased.

Similarly, I was also under the misconception that fine steak should only be cooked on a grill, outdoors. Then my grill sprung a leak so in order to avoid a propane explosion I was forced inside where I grabbed a pan, heated it up, and haven't looked back. You're welcome again.
 
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