"words don't come easy" (1 Viewer)

so, here i am. hi everyone! i don't know how much i am about to write. it may be short, but i'm warning you, it may also be veeeery long. if you like short paragraphs, stop reading now. otherwise, continue.

words don't come easy ... why do i say that? well, because describing my own self seems like a difficult job to me. some would say: "why? you're 'living' with yourself, in a way, why would describing yourself be difficult?" but it is, it actually is. very difficult. because there may be a lot of buk fans out there that are reading my description and i do not really know what you want to know about a person you're reading about. so, that's why it's difficult. also, people in general seem similar on the surface. for example, i could say: "well, i'm about 162 cm high, have brown hair and brown eyes. i like this and that ..." but there are many people who could say the same, so ... how do i differ from others? what should i say about myself? i really do not know. i better just start writing.

i'm R. and i'm 20 years old. when i was 10, i thought 20 was a lot. but now i see, it isn't. sometimes i feel like i know a lot about the world, but there are the days when i feel like i'm lost in the forest, where all of the paths seem the same and i don't know what to do. i still can't figure out how much i know about the world and i can't decide whether my knowledge about the world is enough for me not to be naive in life. but surely i have gained some experience in 20 years. i have. the fact that's clear to me is that the world could be a better place. i can't tell you why in just a few words. maybe i could in a few essays. still, like said, i do not know everything about the world, but what i have seen and heard was enough for me to convince me that it could be a better place. but, "what matters most is how well you walk through the fire". that's exactly what BUK said and i agree 100 % on that. what matters most is how well you cope with problems that surround you. plus, what's MOST important to me, there's inner and outer world. outer world is the world we see with our eyes. inner would is our own world. the world we create. our thoughts, our dreams, our feelings ... i think our inner world is the most important. if i look at myself ... if my inner world is in a good condition, i don't care much about the outer world. and how do i cherish my inner world? i surround myself with people i love. i do the things i like. things that make me happy. and that's what each of us has to do ... we have to find our happiness in things that makes us smile. so ... here's my opinion - if the world's cruel doesn't mean life can't be beautiful.

i can easily say i am happy at the moment. i do not know for how long it is going to last, but at the moment, i am happy. and when i'll be sad, i'll be okay with it, because sometimes you just gotta be a little sad. plus, i try not to worry too much when some problems come. it's better to spend time on solving them. you know, a problem solved makes a man happy and replacing one problem with another is Life.

i LOVE to read BUK and some other poets (i do not really like prose, more poetry, because i cannot concentrate for a long time, so prose is not a very good choice for me). i have tried to write and i have a few words of mine written down, but i do not really consider them poetry or any kind of art and i do not really think i will ever show them to anyone or try to publish them anywhere.
i sing a lot (have a band also) and i draw. i can't really draw, but i love to, when i feel the need to. usually, i draw people. people that are or were important to me.
i love to drink coffee (with milk), energy drinks and ice tea.
i go to bed late. night, in other words, is a time to think, relax and create. my mind awakens.
i do not like the heat. it makes me dizzy, sleepy, cranky and useless. it also causes me headaches. that's why summer ain't my favourite time of the year.
i like owls, i'll probably get one tattooed on my skin. why? in a few words, they are animals of the night, a symbol for intelligence, wisdom, secret and mystery.

well, words really don't come easy, but once you start ... there you are.
hope that was at least a tiny bit interesting to you.

have a nice day/night. :*


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