Sun Dog Press presents: Walkin' With The Beast by Danny Valdez (1 Viewer)

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A year or two ago, I can't remember how long, I came on here and told ya'll about my forthcoming book.

Just about everybody shit on me and trolled the fuck out of the thread.

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Available on Amazon & in stores now. E-Book & book trailer coming soon!
 
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hoochmonkey9

Art should be its own hammer.
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No, I'm still laughing.
People shit on you because you're a dick. Several people, including myself, congratulated you on the book. You were still a self-involved dick, maybe more so.

Enjoy the remainder bin
 
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No, they shit on me because apparently, I was supposed to make more posts before promoting my stuff. I had just gotten the book deal, lived in complete isolation, and was reaching out for some form of human contact/interaction, and got met with hostility. THEN after that, I became a dick, because I don't like being fucked with. Anyone that knows me, knows, I'm not a prick for no reason.

I went and read/stayed with Fante last month and I met a lot of really nice people there in L.A. Things are picking up steam, despite what a few on here said.

Excited for it to finally be out! Got the next book written and ready to go!
 

hoochmonkey9

Art should be its own hammer.
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Still a dick that doesn't know where the comma goes, no matter who you hang with or where you read.
 

jordan

lothario speedwagon
also, hi again danny.
1) reaching out for human contact is what people ASKED you to do. promoting your new book deal, which has nothing to do with bukowski (except for the fact that john martin enjoys your rough touch), is what you did.
2) you compared yourself to bukowski, which made you seem like you have an awfully high opinion of yourself.
3) congratulations on publishing a book with sun dog press and doing readings at cool bookstores. that's something that most writers won't get to experience.
4) unless your book is substantially different than the samples you posted, i still think you're all style over substance. how many references to hair pomade are in the final manuscript?
5) the self-aggrandizing image of yourself on the cover doesn't do you any favors. can you think of another author who put a full-cover portrait of themselves on their first book? (i'm sure you had nothing to do with it. it was probably all al berlinski's idea. i'm sure you hate that photo. okay.)
6) i don't really get what your deal is - you hate the people on this site for being dicks to you, yet you feel compelled to keep posting about your book, despite the fact that very few people on this forum are actually writers who would be jealous of you over it. is this some sort of american idol I'LL SHOW THEM HOW TALENTED I AM triumphant moment? or are you just reaching out for human contact again?
 

mjp

Founding member
unless your book is substantially different than the samples you posted, i still think you're all style over substance.
You're being very generous giving him credit for any style in the things that were/are on line. It read like a lot of middle school dick waving to me.
can you think of another author who put a full-cover portrait of themselves on their first book?
Or better yet, a picture of their belly on the back cover.

I love the quote from John martin though. When I want the last word on what's tough, edgy and rough, I find the nearest 80 year old Christian Scientist and ask them.
 

hoochmonkey9

Art should be its own hammer.
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Just an FYI, Danny edited his original post; he wrote something to the effect that we shit on him for no reason because he had a book deal (and perhaps we're jealous, I can't recall exactly) but now he's having the last laugh, hence my response:

No, I'm still laughing
.

Or maybe John martin edited the post.

If he wasn't a self-aggrandizing dick I wouldn't point it out.
 

mjp

Founding member
(Oh, that's right, we can see the edit history now, I keep forgetting about that.) The last line of his original post was, "Now, I'm the one who laughs." Which explains your reply.

And is more in character with the Fonz's personality as we have come to know and love it.

But that reminds me that I had some delicious pulled pork barbecue tonight. It wasn't technically barbecue, since we cooked it in a slow cooker for a day, but we mixed it up with some nice barbecue sauce and had it open faced tonight, over some olive oil focaccia rolls. It was quite delicious.
 
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Can a mustard based rub be considered authentic barbecue (bar-b-q/'cue)? Or is barbecue solely about the method of
cooking and not about the sauce/rub?
 

hoochmonkey9

Art should be its own hammer.
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Sauce/rub doesn't matter, it's the method.

Side note: I use a charcoal grill and often turn it into a smoker using different wood chips. I do ribs that have been rubbed with a mixture I made up (actually tweaked another recipe ) and finish with a sauce. Using indirect heat it takes about 7 hours from start to finish. Well worth it.
 
Seconded, it's about the method of heating rather than style of cooking. Is there such a thing as an indoor barbecue?
 

hoochmonkey9

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But that reminds me that I had some delicious pulled pork barbecue tonight.

Last month in DC I was at a brew pub and had a pulled pork sandwich. The menu said "served with our spicy coleslaw and garlic fries." When the sandwich came, the slaw was on the pulled pork like a garnish. My first reaction was hell no, but I tried it and it was fantastic.

So were the garlic fries.
 
Pulled pork seems to be all the rage in the UK these days. Probably due to You Gotta Eat Here, Man v. Food and the likes of Jamie Oliver doing shows about American food. Not too long ago asking for a pulled pork sandwich would have gotten a few raised eyebrows.
 

hoochmonkey9

Art should be its own hammer.
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I know that I should not be hurt that you were 90 minutes from me and did not stop by, but I am hurt...
I said "Hi Bill" when I saw the sign for Dover. My wife thought I was nuts.

But we'll be going back to DC I'm sure (my son and I are Nationals fans) and hopefully the trip won't be as rushed so we can drop in and see you. Maybe I can lose a finger in your printing press.
 
it rubs me the wrong way when some place claims to have a 'spicy zesty' barbecue sauce and really they just put too much ground black pepper in there.

and Danny, the cover art is terrible on that book. tough to get past that part of it. were you aiming at the 12-13 year-old girl market segment there?
 

mjp

Founding member
Wait a minute, what's with the bottled water, ese?

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That's pretty fucking bourgeoisie, for a homey like you who's usually keepin' it real and shit, downing his MD 20/20 straight out of mason jars and whatnot.

I don't think you understand - I rely on you to be authentic, dawg, and look at you there, sucking down that expensive fag water like some sort of Scandinavian or something.

Are you selling out, bitch? You got leather pants on under that table, Hollywood?

Shit.

<spit>
 
Wait a minute, what's with the bottled water, ese?
First off, that's Pure Life bottled water, the cheapest water, next to Great Value. So your point is invalid.

Also, I've never claimed to drink MD 20/20, the only thing in my Mason jars is water. Pay attention.

That's the BEST you got? That I'm drinking water? Pffft. Weak shit. Bad form.

Since I started this thread, I've gotten e-mails from two different people that told me to ignore all the bullshit on here. That they read my material and felt a connection with it. So as a result, I've sold two books from this. Thanks.

MJP, you don't give a shit about the word, the line, or the way. Your only concern is propping yourself up, by trolling others. You're a dime a dozen. Guys EXACTLY like you, are on message boards all over the internet. Do you know this? Do you know, that all this time you spend insulting people and making snarky comments is a complete waste? It's not an accomplishment. These little digital victories of yours may give you that boost of self-esteem, you so desperately need, but don't you know that they're wastes of time? When you could be writing a novel or a poem or a short story or ANYTHING...you're not. You're on here. Talking shit. For an older dude, you sure do have a lot of growing up to do. But it's cool. I ain't mad at ya. I'm sure something terrible happened to you, at some point, so you're probably like this for a reason. Either way, it's too bad. Life is so short and it's such a waste to be so cynical and pissed off all the time.

My internet is getting shut off later today, so I won't be back anytime soon.

- VALDEZ
i wonder if he ever relaxes and lets his collar down...
At least once a day, when work is done.
 

hoochmonkey9

Art should be its own hammer.
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MJP, you don't give a shit about the word, the line, or the way. Your only concern is propping yourself up, by trolling others. You're a dime a dozen.

you're getting ripped off. I get my mjp's at Target, baker's dozen for a nickel.

When you could be writing a novel or a poem or a short story or ANYTHING...you're not. You're on here.

yeah, he sure is lazy...

For an older dude, you sure do have a lot of growing up to do.

please don't make fun of his height. he's sensitive.

I'm sure something terrible happened to you, at some point, so you're probably like this for a reason.

yes, he has to put up with people like you.

My internet is getting shut off later today, so I won't be back anytime soon.

huzzaah for faulty technology.
 

mjp

Founding member
I'm sure something terrible happened to you, at some point...
Well, now that I think of it, I did read some of your poetry. That was a terrible thing.

But seriously, it's very exciting, that first book, so good for you. I hope your posts here rake in a lot of cash money business and you sell dozens of copies. With a winning personality like yours, the writing is really secondary, so I predict great success.

You are welcome here any time.

Mainly because I never tire of watching indescribably talentless - yet somehow hugely egotistical - idiots waving their dicks around. It's oddly compelling and entertaining. Like watching American Idol auditions, only I don't have to see Ryan Seacrest's face.

please don't make fun of his height. he's sensitive.
As you know, I'm six feet tall in heels. Let's not perpetuate stereotypes and myths.
 
...Several people, including myself, congratulated you on the book.

Okay, I had decided to not comment in this tread for some time due to the small weight never measures up to the large, but I never recall you congratulating him on the book being published. If anything I remember you posting his book in a thread I started on "Books I never want to read..." I understand he was probably rather arrogant in relaying the praise he'd received by certain individuals well-known around these parts but being young and told certain things about his craftsmanship certainly didn't help in his wayward virtues around these parts - what's a poor boy do to? I've read his latest book (and only book published) and it's pretty damn good. Stop swinging off mjp's nuts and read it for yourself.
 

Pogue Mahone

Officials say drugs may have played a part
Maybe we just like booze, pussy and sleep more than an arrogant little prick who thinks he can walk into a bar with skin as thick as toilet paper. Generation Yine needs to get over the soccer trophy they got for just showing up and forget the Purple Heart they thought they deserved after a little girl kicked them in the shin.
 
I'd give you that if it was easy as that. But it's not. Go fuck yourself. You are still adorning the X-mas tree. Repeat, rinse.
 

mjp

Founding member
No, it's what he does right before his annual "meltdown and stomping off in a huff, vowing never to return." Which he always does (unfortunately) a month or two later.

You just haven't been around long enough to see it before. You'll get used to it.
 
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